New Kids on the Block

The first Monday Night Raw after TLC,  and eventually, leading to Wrestlemania. How is the WWE going to get this party started?

The show starts, oddly enough, with the lights down and a drumroll sounding over the speakers. The voice of CM Punk sounds as he announces who won at TLC in between him, Del Rio, and the Miz, all in an Oscar-esque style. Once revealing he won, Punk goes to the ring and does the same set up twice more, once to announce Zack Ryder’s win against Dolph Ziggler to become the US Champion, and again to announce Daniel Bryan cashing in the Money in the Bank briefcase against the Big Show to become World Heavyweight Champion. I’m not certain that the elongated drumrolls an attempted suspense prior to the revelations was really necessary. I know they were going for an awards show motif, but everyone at the arena probably knew who won at TLC, and thus the dragging out of telling us what we know seemed like padding. The three then discuss how none of them were ever expected to be champions of the WWE, and while I do sympathize and am happy that all three men get to revel in their success, the segment kind of came off as a bit too self-congratulating: there seemed to be an undertone of “I was right, and everyone else was wrong” to it, which, while true, seems a bit too smug for the good guys. Admittedly, that’s probably just me reading it the wrong way.

But you can’t have a good guy get together without having a heel interruption, and true enough, out comes Miz, Del Rio, and Dolph Ziggler, all looking mightily upset. Dolph looks odd without his US Championship around his waist. The three heels don’t stop to banter, and proceed to march to the ring with a purpose. Unfortunately, they don’t do a very good job: Dolph fails an attempt at attacking Ryder and gets thrown back out of the ring, and then the three heels huddle as if planning, until Ryder leaps over the tope rope at them. I really don’t know what Team Heel were supposed to be discussing here in their group meeting: I know it’s a set up for the Ryder move, but there should at least be a kind of purpose behind it. At any rate, Punk and Bryan rush out of the ring and start attacking. I do like how the faces aren’t going to meekly allow the heels to beat up on them: it shows that they’re tougher than the average Joe, and as the name of the game is trying to make me care about Daniel Bryan as a Champion, having him actively doing something heroic is a good start. Team Heel beats a swift retreat, tailed by the good guys, until John Laurinaitis steps in. I adore how Miz runs back stage, and once Laurinaitis comes out, he stands behind him and starts taunting Punk, as if he’s the one being held back. Awesome classic heel stuff. Laurinaitis does what any sane GM would do in this position, and declare the main event of Raw to be a six man tag match between Bryan, Punk, and Ryder vs. ZIggler, Miz, and Del Rio. Two things to note here. First, I like how Raw is going the Smackdown approach and announcing the main event at the beginning of the show  via storyline, as there is more motivation and character presence in the set up and thus more interest from the audience. Second, it’s a main event on Monday Night Raw without Orton, Cena, or Triple H. When was the last time that happened? It’s definitely a good way to start putting over the next generation by making the show more about them.

Our first match of the night, however, is Wade Barrett vs. Randy Orton. I generally dislike how Raw disregards the brand extension and uses the big stars from both shows. The favor is rarely returned to Smackdown, and also, a good chunk of the mid card doesn’t get screen time as a result. At any rate, this is a surprisingly good match. The pacing is kept up to a good speed, and I don’t know if it’s because he’s no longer at the main event level or not, but Orton seems more comfortable in his matches as of late. It might be because he doesn’t have to be the ultimate good guy, and thus doesn’t have to constantly make himself look like Superman. He seems more content to go out there and just have a match, rather than developing his Viper persona. Barrett looks good here too, and even though he has a limited range of moves, he knows when to use them and how to get the most pop out of them. What stands out here is the ending: Wade gets DQ’d by thumbing Orton in the eye, which, in times past, would mean that Wade gets a win on his resume but Orton still gets to go crazy, maim the guy, and look cool. Not so here. After getting DQ’d, Barrett continues to brutalize Randy, eventually sending him through a table with Wasteland. Two potential things to be read from this. One, that this is a way for Barrett to keep face after losing to Orton at TLC. Two, putting Barrett over and making him look dominant for a potential run at the World Heavyweight Championship. Either way, Wade Barrett looks good here, and Orton does not. If that’s not a sign that the times, they are a-changing, I don’t know what is.

Things that are definitely not changing, however, are the Diva matches. Beth Phoenix is still our Diva’s Champion, but unlike the efforts to put over the three male champions earlier in the show, the booking department seems more inclined to bury Beth. She’s fighting Alicia Fox tonight, who has taken to wearing a fur headdress of a fox. I’m a bit surprised the animal rights activists haven’t already nixed this, but maybe they don’t watch wrestling. Also, Alicia has this strange element to her that she simply cannot just walk. She slinks, glides, and looks like she’s made of some kind of spaghetti as she moves. She’s constantly writhing, and while I’m sure she thinks this is a turn on for men, it’s kind of creepy to watch, even moreso with the disembodied head of a fox on her noggin. The match starts, and as it’s only about two minutes long, the first minute is Beth getting on top, and then the second minute is Alicia coming back. The ending was probably the most anticlimactic thing you could imagine: apparently, Alicia has a new finisher where she performs a front flip into a leg drop on the opponents head… but no one realized this was her finisher. As such, when she hit it and got the pin, everyone in the audience seemed more confused about what just happened and why Beth was laid out like that. Also slightly painful was that Alicia got a mic after the match, and, with a massive smile, asked us all to have a “Foxy Christmas.” In and of itself, it’s not bad, but looking at her expression and her body language, you get the impression she thought she just dropped the cleverest line of the night. Alicia, I like you, you’re funny, but you’re just getting odder and odder.

I’m also sad to say that Jinder Majal is still here, and still desperately trying to be a serious bad guy without actually bringing much personality or character to the table. They keep trying to have him strike up rivalries, but his sole motivation is always “You’re a peasant, and I’m rich, so I hate you.” Compare that to Del Rio, who revels in how much a rich jerk he’s being and will smile about it, and you can see that the talking point all alone doesn’t hold up. He’s having a match against Sheamus, who’s confident grin indicates he’s not too intimidated by Jinder’s attempts at being pithy. The match itself is better than I thought it would be, with more give and take and a very steady and fast pacing. I believe this is the first time I’ve seen Jinder in a non-squash match, either with him doing the squashing or being on the receiving end. But Jinder is no match for Sheamus, who hits him with the Celtic Cross to win. It wasn’t a bad segment, but I don’t see the real point of it. It makes Sheamus look tough and Jinder look sucky, but we knew that already. Hopefully, they can cook up a better feud for Sheamus in the future.

Speaking of developing storylines, the show now goes on to address the Chokeslam that Cena received from Kane last week. Cena comes out to the ring, and says that he’s not too certain why exactly Kane attacked him, as they have no business. If he was just in the wrong place at the wrong time, then everyone can live happily ever after. I love that Cena totally understands that Kane has violent bursts of rage, and is willing to overlook it. Mark Henry comes out, still wearing a cast around his ankle, and I’m temporarily confused as to why he’s here instead of in a Daniel Bryan or Big Show segment until I remember that he’s the one who injured Kane all those months ago. I also wonder how legit Henry’s injury might be, and whether that’s why they had him drop the belt. Henry says that Cena has no business being out here, while the World’s Strongest Man has business addressing his loss at TLC. I’m glad they gave Henry a good reason for being present, though again, it would make more sense if any of the people who actually screwed him over were present. However, Mark doesn’t get to air his grievances, because who should enter but Kane, back in his mask after long last, and also with his old theme music. Kane walks right by Cena and heads for Mark Henry, who’s asking for mercy due to the fact he’s injured. I don’t really like when Mark has to plead, as I really love when he’s just a tough guy who will take all comers, but I suppose if Kane had half a mind to kill me, I’d be begging for mercy too. At any rate, it doesn’t look like Kane is interested in Mark at all, and goes after Cena. This segment played out nicely, as you really do start wondering who Kane’s going to attack, and raises the tension. Cena, however, is ready as always and gets a few shots in against Kane before having the Big Red Monster take him down a notch. Again, I like how Cena is being presented as more human: it makes him more identifiable to the audience, and the trouble he gets in more interesting, as you don’t know whether he’ll pull a Superman or not. Kane brutalizes Cena for a bit before more or less choking him on the announce table, which I thought was a banned move (it got Daniel Bryan fired, anyways). Kane gets bored of this, and settles for stealing Cena’s shirt before leaving. Not sure where we’re going with the shirt thing, but I like it when Kane has some deep dark intent that no one else gets.

Happily, it looks like the WWE is starting to take its tag teams seriously again, as we have a match between the Uso Brothers vs. Epico and Primo. Not two random wrestlers being thrown together, but actual tag teams. I really love the Uso’s entrance: that war chant really pumps up the crowd and instantly gets you on their side. On the flip side, Epico and Primo are a little bland. They’re just your run of the mill grumpy heels, but at least they wrestle very well. And not only do we have an actual tag match, but it’s a great tag match. There’s a lot of double teaming, the action is fast, and they don’t just run out the “one team member in peril, waiting to make the hot tag.” The tags are often and fast, and dang, I’m just excited to have the semblance of a tag division again, with people who actually know what they’re doing. Primo eventually hits a rather awkward Backstabber, and his team gets the win. I was pulling for the Usos, but it makes sense that a heel team would win with Air Boom as the current champions. Hope for good things!

Sadly, things take a quick downturn as our next match is Cody Rhodes versus Santino Marella. The problem I have with Santino is that his jobbing doesn’t even do the job of putting the other guy over. He’s become such a weak character that beating him doesn’t mean anything. Cody wins, and no one is surprised. Much like Sheamus, I hope they give Cody a decent storyline and rivalry soon.

Prior to the main event, we have a short interview with the Big Show, who is obviously upset about having the World Heavyweight Championship stolen from him. I really liked Show’s acting in this segment: he looks and sounds like a man who has worked very hard for something, only to have it snatched away. He doesn’t go for any of the clichés of either yelling too much, or trying to be indifferent. HE looks genuinely crushed, and you really feel sorry for him. I especially like how Show seems to know that he was the one who tried to pressure Bryan into using his briefcase before Wrestlemania, and thus has an extra amount of angst piled on. I’m assuming that this will lead to a Big Show heel turn against Bryan, but I like how they’re going with it by developing character and motivation and easing into things. Also, he doesn’t punch Josh when he brings up that a title reign that took nine years to get to, and only lasted five minutes, so there’s still good in Big Show yet.

And now, on to our main event: Dolph Ziggler, the Miz, and Alberto Del Rio vs. Daniel Bryan, Zack Ryder, and CM Punk. True to their “For the people, by the people” attitude, the three faces enter through the crowd entrances, rather than the ramp. It’s a neat touch and a good throw back to ECW. The match itself, however, is surprisingly basic. After a quick flurry of offense by the good guys, the heels manage to isolate Daniel Bryan, and beat up on him until he makes the hot tag to Ryder, who in turn winds up in peril, and then Punk gets in and cleans house. It’s your standard good vs. bad tag match, and a bit disappointing when you consider the wrestling ability of all of these men. I was hoping for more tags and more chances for multiple one on one match ups, but alas. Bryan gets tagged in at the end and forces Del Rio to tap out with the crossface. I’m happy that Bryan was the one who got to finish things off, because out of all of them, he’s the one who needs to be put over as dominating.

So that’s our first Raw of the season, and it was surprisingly good. There were a couple of down moments with Santino, Jinder Majal, and Alicia Fox’s continuing oddities, but those were brief and didn’t take the whole show down. Barrett’s win signals good things to come, I’m all for the story with Kane and Cena, the tag match was great, and even if the main event wasn’t stellar, it was still a sign that there’s new main eventers on the block, and the WWE intends to use them.