The World's Strongest Character Overhaul

With one more show before Over the Limit, how will Smackdown keep the action rising and the intrigue growing?

Our opening match this week is a one on one bout with Christian vs. Sheamus. I have nothing ill to say of this match, as it does everything well. In fact, it’s nearly the ideal opening match: it’s fast paced, fun, energizes the crowd for things to come, and still has a plot behind it. For Christian, it’s trying to build momentum, and for Sheamus, it’s trying to re-establish himself as a major contender (incidentally, did Sheamus ever get a rematch against Kofi for his US Title? I don’t believe so). Not to mention that this match uses the strengths of both men to their full potential, with Sheamus brawling and Christian’s technique/flying hybrid, as well as letting both men get in as much of their move sets as possible. The ending is neat too, with Christian winning via roll-up. The look on Sheamus’s face as he realizes he’s lost on such an easy move is priceless: he’s so totally aghast. Christian has little time to celebrate, for Mark Henry arrives to provide a beating. I’m not certain why Sheamus and Mark Henry have taken to being a make-shift team, but hey, it gives them something to do. And as I may have said before, I find myself increasingly behind this Mark Henry push: he’s not just a brooding big man, he’s taking great pleasure in what he does, giving him a better angle than just being angry. He has more of a character now, with the idea that he really doesn’t care about what people think about him now, and that he’s just going to do what he wants, giving him more motivation than just being an angry heel or a jolly face. Well, him and Sheamus begin the ceremonial beat down, when who should appear but Randy Orton! He is greeted with cheers, while he... stands there. For like, a minute, watching while Christian gets beat up. Kind of a jerk thing to do, Randy. Now, if they are going to teeter on his being a heel with this, and make him more selfish and jerk-like, that’s fine. I can buy Orton as a heel better than a semi-face, which has always been completely unbelievable. But the crowd reaction here is so absurd as they cheer Orton’s inaction, as if they agree that he shouldn’t help Christian. What? Seriously, who on Earth backs Orton more than Christian? He’s a good guy too, y’know. Orton gets off his ass and dashes to the rescue, helping get Sheamus as Mark out of the ring. Goody. I hate how they’re increasingly painting Christian to be helpless. My fear here is that they’re going to wind up turning him heel and keep Orton face, which makes no sense. Christian is a money making face, and Orton is passable as a heel. Why turn this system on its head for the benefit of Orton’s fangirls?

Our next match tonight is Brie Bella vs. Natalya. Never mind who’s holding the belt, Natalya takes Brie to school here, and shows why the Bellas are a joke and why the women like Natalya should be getting more screen time. Nattie just unloads a furious offense on Brie, hitting her with a variety of moves, each one more impressive than the last. Snapmares, Suplexes, takedowns, clothelines, heck, she counters out of a headlock by lifting Brie onto her back and then falling back on her. Seriously, I can only hope that Kharma’s push means that we’re getting geared for more serious women’s division, because Natalya can put on a better wrestling show than most of the men, including the current Heavyweight Champion. Brie gets in her one actual move (a facebuster) and wins, but we all know who the real winner in this was. Natalya impressed everyone, and actually garnered quite the fan-reaction from the audience, who are usually indifferent to the women’s matches. See what happens when you put the entertaining Divas with actual wrestling ability on the show? Fans start paying attention. Of course, it’s then announced that at Over the Limit, the Divas Title will be fought for between Brie Bella and Kelly Kelly. I am sad.

We continue our saga with the Corre and it’s ever shifting storyline. It seems that the blow up scheduled for the entire Corre has been postponed while we try and put Ezekiel Jackson over. Zeke comes out and is much more well spoken than I thought. Sadly, he’s still a little dull. His whole driving motivation literally seems to be that he’s big. He brags about the reason the Corre did well was because of his strength. He talks about his ability to dominate due to his size. Zeke is a one note man, and that note is not that catchy. I mean, if he wants to be a face, that’s fine, but there needs to be more to this guy than just his size. Wade Barrett and friends agree, as they come out to teach Jackson a lesson. I notice that Heat Slater has taken to wearing tights rather than his usual trunks. Luckily for Zeke, Big Show and Kane come to the rescue, triggering Teddy Long to make a six man tag team match between the two sides. I have to say that a team of Ezekiel Jackson, Big Show, and Kane would be terrifying. I do have to say that this match is better than expected, primarily because the Corre doesn’t really cheat or aim to get disqualified. Jackson get’s the win when he puts Gabriel in a Torture Rack, which I’m guessing is going to be his new finisher. I’m behind that, as it’s better than his Rock-Bottom ripoff. Still, Jackson is going to have to pull up his socks if he hopes to become interesting any time soon.

And now, Chavo Guerrero will show us what he’s made of. This guy really is an underrated piece of work: his mic skills are on the ball, and he’s gota good mix of speed, acrobatics, and technical skills. In fact, I don’t think there’s a guy who’s suffered as much as Chavo since the Cruiserweight Title was retired, as that was where he really made his mark. Chavo complains that Sin Cara was incredibly ungrateful last week, and that he could not have beat Daniel Bryan without Chavo’s help. In order to show how much better he is than the newcomer, Chavo vows to beat Daniel Bryan in five minutes. This match is all right, but I feel that Bryan isn’t putting Chavo over very well, as he seems to try and do more countering and showing off his own stuff than really making Chavo look good. Especially with the end, where Chavo does the Frog Splash near the ten second mark, and Bryan still kicks out. I know that in this case, it’s a booker’s decision to have him not lose in five minutes, but it doesn’t really do Chavo any favours to no-sell his finisher like that. Chavo is irate that he has failed to win within the time limit, and is about to exact his revenge on Bryan when Sin Cara comes to the rescue. Sin Cara has made the unfortunate decision to wear his T-Shirt, which doesn’t look great when you’re going as the Man of Mystery. Also, the light blue color makes it look like he’s in his pajamas. The two are to have a match at Over the Limit, making me almost break down and buy it, just to support Chavo.

Up next is a strange segment with Ted Dibiase and Cody Rhodes. The two enter the ring together, implying that they’re on the same page. I’m guessing the idea is that Cody is trying to help Ted get back on track (the irony there is still staggering, no matter how many times I think of it), and they start things off with Cody putting a paper bag on Ted’s head. Ted then starts to do an impression of someone whom I don’t recognize, but I guess is Mexican (seriously, I have no idea who he’s doing here), and I’m unclear as to how this is helping Ted gear up for anything. I mean, maybe the idea is to humiliate him so that he feels more compelled to succeed, but then, why did he do the imitation? Who are they taking a shot at? And why would it make Ted angry, or make him more likely to succeed? At any rate, Ted is having a match against Trent Baretta, whom he beats quickly, giving him the first win he’s had in months. I’m  good with that, but I just don’t know what the heck the motivation was in this scene.

Speaking of motivations I don’t know about: The Great Khali and this Jinder Mahal schmuck. I suppose that he’s taking over as Khali’s manager, and the writers are trying to turn Khali back into a monster heel. But the fact is, the guy is still as dull as can be. Khali beats Jey Uso  with ease, and then goes off with Jinder. See how quickly I typed that? That’s because there’s little to say: it’s boring. Khali is boring, this new guy is boring, and I notice that Drew McIntyre is still without screen time on either show.

Main event time, with Randy Orton vs. Mark Henry. This is one of the very few times where you will see a match carried by Mark Henry. He is the one doing all the work in this match, with Orton doing his tried and true method of doing absolutely nothing until the end like a useless sack of potatoes. And again, Henry seems to be constantly improving. He’s still slow (for a guy his size, how fast can he be?) but he’s no longer plodding: he’s constantly moving, making up for the general lack of actual action by at least keeping the pace, giving the audience something to look at other then dead air. Before, Henry would often just stand there when not making a move; if he were to strike a guy down with a power move, he would wait for thirty or so seconds while the other guy got back up. Now, he doesn’t waste time, knocking Orton down and then pursuing the retreat in order to follow up with the assault. His offence is now constant and persistent, rather than a few bursts of power. Orton does none of these things, taking a beating while pretending to sell moves. It drives me nuts that Orton can’t sell anything now, considering that was his biggest strength when he first came in. He used to sell power moves like death, and now it’s more like a mild inconvenience. It’s fitting that this match ends in a DQ, with Sheamus coming out of nowhere and stopping Orton from doing the RKO. In a mirror move of earlier in the show, Christian appears at the stage, and waits for a while before deciding to arrive. I notice this earns boos from some of the idiots in the crowd who have somehow deducted that this is any worse than what Orton did earlier on. Granted, given that Christian should be acting the hero, he should have gone in without hesitation, but given that it’s Orton getting beat up, I don’t remotely care. Christian does eventually come to the rescue, driving out the two heels while he and Orton stand tall, glaring at one another. You deserve so much better, Christian.

Thus Smackdown, and it’s a huge improvement since last time. The bookers and writers have gotten over the post-draft hump and are starting to develop storylines again. Mark Henry and Sheamus are becoming more and more compelling as the main heels of the show, Natalya got to put on a clinic of what the women’s division /should/ be like, Ted and Cody do indeed seem to be going somewhere, and the matches were generally very good. I still hate Khali and Orton, but even they can’t entirely sink this battleship. So we go into Over the Limit with question marks regarding Christian and Orton, and who will  walk away a face or a heel (never mind the World Heavyweight Championship, this match is about character development). Screw the inevitable; Let’s go, Christian.