Game: On

So, to recap Raw's Road to Wrestlemania: Mediocre, Bad, Great, Good, Boring. How will it's final attempt fare?  

We open the show with CM Punk sitting in the ring, smiling at the mixed reception he’s receiving from the Chicago crowd, who doesn’t know if they should cheer their hometown guy or boo him. Punk says he doesn’t really care, because all he’s concerned about right now is Randy Orton. He claims that all of Orton’s deeds thus far are pointless, because after his last attack on Orton last week, his wife now sees what Randy really is, as he laid on the concrete in an impotent lump. Good move Punk: always go for the family line. Nothing gets to people more than attacks on loved ones. Punk goes to leave the ring, but alas, Randy’s music starts playing. True enough, Orton comes out of the back, but his knee is bandaged, and he’s limping. Punk is grinning like a wolf, attacking Orton once he finally gets into the ring. Unfortunately for Punk, most of Orton’s four moves don’t really need his knees, and so he executes the mid-ring DDT. However, give credit to Orton, he does keep in injured character by falling as he goes for the punt. Punk catches on (does anyone grin maliciously half as well as Punk?) and starts assaulting the leg, finishing with a GTS.

I have to say that I enjoyed when Punk criticized the people who were cheering him, commenting that he could snap his fingers and any one of them would fetch him a coffee like a sheep. The heels always attack the good-guy fans, but rarely do they attack the smarks (heel fans), and I like that Punk branched out. He’s trying to sever ties with a devoted fan base in order to secure his status as a bad guy, and I personally appreciate the effort. If you read my blog on JBL's return a few weeks ago, I comment how heels are too likable now and get too many cheers for being evil. Punk tries to avoid this, and I think it's great.

Our first real match of the night is Edge and Christian versus Alberto Del Rio and Brodus Clay. Why are they having a match when it was made quite plain on Smackdown that Del Rio and Edge weren’t allowed to touch one another until Wrestlemania? We are told it’s because that rule only applies on Smackdown, and as this is Raw, all bets are off. Thus the entire plot point introduced last Friday is pointless. Good work, Raw. Things start off with Edge and Christian doing their classic Tag Team stuff against Clay, who, like a good minion, is taking his beating like a trooper. However, Del Rio gets in the ring, and starts to go to work against Christian. I’m not certain how I feel about Del Rio having a minion. It fits his character, being a millionaire and all, but we’ve seen that he is quite capable on his own, and I feel stronger as such. Anyways, the match shifts again, and Edge spears Clay, while unbeknownst to him, Del Rio has Christian in the Arm Bar at ringside. Edge chases him off, but Del Rio returns and does the same to Edge. This would all have a lot more bearing if it hadn't screwed with the dramatic twist introduced last week.

I notice that Cole’s monitor now has decals of his face. Very nice.

Backstage, Alex Riley and the Miz have managed to hang the WWE logo upside down at the photo-op area. How long did that take, guys?

The Evil Lappy GM bleeps, and King begs Cole to come out and read it. However, Cole smirks, he is now receiving the emails from within his box. It seems the laptop wants to know if Lawler is in any condition to fight at Wrestlemania, and so he will be having match against Jack Swagger tonight.

Why, look! It’s the Corre! I have a question: are any of Raw’s superstars in the building tonight? Apparently not, because Big Show and Kane come out to face them, along with Santino and Koslov. It is indeed made official that the Corre will face these other four men in a tag match at Wrestlemania. But tonight, it is to be Santino versus Gabriel. The match itself is nothing special, given that it’s a man with one move versus the comic relief. What happens outside the ring is of interest and amusement to me. The Corre finally have the tables turned on them as the Big Show, Kane, and Koslov each start beating down the newcomers. Of course, it’s not completely an ironic twist of fate, because the three don’t proceed to stomp on the Corre for five minutes. Now /that/ would let them know the agony they’ve inflicted on us for the last four months (ten, if you count the Nexus). Actually, thinking about it, Santino isn’t really needed in this mini-faction. Seriously, just having three of the largest, most intimidating men in the WWE would probably do the job. Santino wins the match, and commences with his usual pantomime trombone routine. Koslov joins in, being a good tag team member, and Big Show is so jovial that he joins in too. This leaves Kane, who looks utterly dumbfounded as to what’s going on. We all wait for him to start chokeslamming people... when, oddly, he adopts the trombone too. Now, while this is a very out of character thing for Kane to do, given that he’s completely insane and borderline homicidal (he did kill the Undertaker, after all... Oh, wait, no he didn’t), it’s not like it murders his aura. This isn’t the first time Kane has dropped character and done something funny: remember when he did that backstage segment with the Rock and Hulk Hogan and stole their catchphrases? Even when he was with RVD, he seemed a little lighter. So long as this doesn’t become a thing, I thought Kane’s moment of comedy was actually well done.

Finally, after much bitching and moaning by my self, we get a promo with the Undertaker and Triple H in the same ring together. Remember why this was such a big issue to me? How I knew that these two guys were much better than what they've been showing thus far? How I needed more emotional investment? How there needed to be more one-upmanship? How Triple H needed to pull up the slack?

Oh, God, yes. All this and more.

Seriously, I've been out of touch with this match up for five weeks, and in one episode, I was made to not only care about it, but look forward to it with gusto. This was a perfect promo, maybe one of the best I've ever seen, especially considering that the two are building off of nothing. I said that Undertaker and Triple H are the two of the best all times because of their abilities to build interesting storylines, and this bit displayed that perfectly.

It starts off with the Undertaker entering to his usual music, only to be interrupted halfway through by Triple H's music. Then, when Hunter goes for his usual water-spit, he's interrupted by the Undertaker's bell toll. Beautiful. Without even saying a word, we've already had so much happen: the two are trying to out-show one another with just the /music/, never mind the match. If they care this much about duelling their entrances, imagine how they'll act in the ring? I also love how pissed off Taker looks when his entrance is interrupted, and his look of satisfaction when he does the same to Triple H.

Then, oddly enough, Shawn Michaels interrupts everything by a sudden appearance. Michaels can make anything funny: he seems completely oblivious to the fact that he's walked in on the two other men, and poses down to the crowd while Triple H and Undertaker just glare at him. Finally, HBK catches on, and apologizes. They didn't think, he says, that he'd miss out on this? Much as he has for the last month, Shawn tells the audience why this match is big and the accolades of those involved. Only without the floating head this time. Having done the usual preamble, Shawn points at the Undertaker, and asks why the Hell he thinks...

And then, Shawn directs his point to Hunter. "...that you can do what I couldn't?" And just like that, the mood of the segment has altered. Shawn is no longer out here just for laughs: he's confronting his best friend on the grounds of pride. And, when you think about it, Michaels nearly went insane last year during his build-up to his match with the Undertaker, so it stands to reason he should resent that anyone thinks they could have done a better job than him. Hunter takes a deep breath, and, trying to put it as tactfully as possible, tells Shawn that he had gotten soft, that Shawn had never had to win at Wrestlemania in order to steal the show (which is totally true. Shawn's win/loss record at Wrestlemania is questionable, yet his matches are nearly always the best). Such is not the case for Triple H, who needs to win, and more importantly, can drop all moral standards in order to do so. Hunter than addresses the Undertaker, and tells him just how much he respects the Deadman. But, in a sort of roundabout way, he gets to the point that sometimes, stars need to be told when the time has come to step down and retire. Then, looking Undertaker in the eye, he tells him that it's time. That's right, Triple H just called the Undertaker old. That he couldn't bring his A-game. That he was washed up. How much of a bigger verbal slap in the face can you give? I love the mix of cheers and boos  that Hunter is earning: he's understood that the crowd is divided on who they want to win, and as such, is trying to be both a heel and face simultaneously. And the insult to the Undertaker's ability is such a bigger draw than just an issue of respectability: for the first time, Triple H sounds like he wants to beat the Undertaker, that he can break the streak, that he's that much better. Thank you, Triple H, I knew you could do it.

The Undertaker responds by saying that if there ever came a time where he needed to be put down, he would love Triple H to be the man to do the deed. But, he asserts, /this is not that time./ Throughout this build-up over the last few months, Undertaker has made it work by telling us that he has no worries about losing, because he's still as powerful and god-like as before. Undertaker then does as Triple H did, and earns himself a few boos, just to split the emotion of the fan base even further (which is brilliant. Conflicted emotions equals greater interest!). He decides to use Shawn Michaels as an example, and how he, like Triple H, though he could defeat the Undertaker, and that you could see that confidence in his eyes. But now, all that is in Shawn's eyes is apprehension, doubt, and the knowledge that he ultimately failed. Michaels is good at showing his silent anger in this part, looking like a man ready to explode. And so, says the Undertaker, Triple H will end up like Shawn Michaels did in the end: just another number. That's a stinger: saying that all of this guys power and abilities will simply be devolved to a negative statistic to simply feed the beast that is the Streak.

HBK cracks, and tries to Superkick Taker... who blocks it, shaking his head condescendingly at Michaels. That says so much: that Shawn, quite simply, is no longer capable of even testing the Undertaker, thus cementing his shattered pride, while also telling Triple H that after he too falls, he will also never be able to bring the same kind of power as he does now. Again, to Michaels' credit, he looks devastated that he couldn't kick Taker. Triple H goes face to face with Undertaker, and demands that Shawn tells Undertaker just why Triple H is going to beat him at Wrestlemania. Both he, and the audience, obviously expect a classic DX style hype. But Shawn is silent. Hunter waits and waits, starts to break his stare with the Undertaker to try and see what the heck is going on, and looks positively stunned to see Michaels unable to tell Triple H that he's going to win. HBK, in shame, leaves the ring, leaving Triple H shocked. Undertaker watches all of this, then, with a cocky little smile, tips his hat to Triple H, and exits with all of his mystique in tact, whilst Hunter seems almost broken in the ring.

This. Was. Awesome. The segment went through almost a three act structure, with the comedic beginning, to the intimidation and counter in the middle, to the almost tragic ending, with all moods being transitioned smoothly and believably. Triple H finally acts like this match means something to him, and now even more so, as he has seen what losing such a match has done to his best friend, and making the necessity to win all the greater. Undertake comes across as confident, almost cocky, which I love: the Undertaker /should/ be cocky. He's the damn /Undertaker!/ He knows that he's great and undefeatable, and thus you feel that the Streak means so much more than just a random storyline. Michaels, even without being in the show anymore, added droves to his character by seeing how much he's fallen since we last saw him, and how it still eats him up inside (expect interference at Wrestlemania, given that it's No Holds Barred). The match now has an emotional factor, mental intrigue, the characters are invested, I'm invested, and damn, this was a great segment!

Oh, right, the rest of the show.

The next match is the afore-mentioned Swagger versus Lawler. I have to say, I liked how they decided to go with this one. I was expecting another Swagger squash match, but Lawler doesn't even bother with that and just goes after Swagger with a chair. Sure, he gets disqualified, but it shows that King's had enough: he's spent five weeks getting taunted, and he's ready to beat some heads. Really, Jerry hasn't had the same level of character building in this story that Cole has, so to have this bit where we get to see him vent some frustration really helps let us know where his mindset is at. After his beat down of Swagger, King tries to go after Cole, who is hiding inside of his box. Security eventually takes Lawler away, and as they do so, Cole throws his drink in Jerry's face. I cannot wait to see King beat the hell out of Cole. Honestly, I don't think I've ever been more geared up for a throwaway match!

We now get a tag match between Sheamus and Dolph Ziggler vs. Daniel Bryan and John Morrison. This is a pretty good match. Nothing to write home about. I wish that this time had been used to build some more intrigue between these guys matches at Wrestlemania, but I'll take a good wrestling match instead.

Backstage, Orton tells us that we shouldn't be concerned if he makes it to Wrestlemania: we should be concerned if Punk makes it out. Our hero, ladies and gentlemen!

More Snooki bits, don't care, moving on.

Actually, I feel that I should address something. It's obvious that I don't care for Snooki, and that I find her inclusion at Wrestlemania to be generally insulting. However, it's been pointed out to me, and I agree, that celebrity appearances at Wrestlemania, and their involvement in matches, is nothing new. We had it at the first one with Mr. T, and we've had them in nearly every Wrestlemania since. They're included in order to draw in some crowds that wouldn't order the event otherwise, and try and crank up the revenue potential. Obviously, this sacrifices some integrity and is a bit of a snub to the real wrestlers, but as Wrestlemania is the biggest investment of the WWE, they are obligated to keep in mind the funds they garner with such a sceptical. As such, with Jersey Shore being of considerable popularity, it makes sense to include Snooki to try and draw in a demographic into Wrestlemania, and perhaps, after luring their interest, keeping them. I think the primary outrage that this particular inclusion of a celebrity is the fact that it's Snooki, and she represents most everything I hate about popular culture, she can't act, she's annoying, and Jersey Shore is a terrible show. Most wresting fans agree. Still, keep in mind that her inclusion within Wrestlemania is going to be limited to a single match in a four hour event, and chances are her actual time within the match is going to be under five minutes. It sucks, it's annoying, but it's not the end of the world.

 Finally, we get the face off we've all been waiting for: Rock and Cena in the same ring. Rock comes out first, and I have to say, isn't quite on the ball with this one. He does some general motivational speech bits, and of course it's good, but it kind of takes away the momentum of the segment, and as we were all hoping for another verbal castration of Cena, this kind of goes amiss. Cena comes out, and says that all this time, he's been trying to figure out what the Rock's problem is with him. He goes through the list (the color purple, rap, audience, etc), and claims that these are all trivial problems, and that the Rock has been wasting his time. I have to say, the thing I've always loved about Cena is how down to Earth and self aware he is. He's more than aware he's not going to get the Chicago crowd to cheer him over the Rock, and doesn't try, so we get more of a serious version of Cena than we usually do when he's trying to pump up the arena. Rock and Cena face one another...

...When who else should come out but the Miz! The Miz will always be lost in a ring with Cena and Rock (who wouldn't be?), but he gets a couple of good barbs in. He says that he doesn't mind facing Cena at Wrestlemania, because at least John's always ready for a fight... unlike the Rock. Miz earns some serious boos here, and rightfully so. It's funny, because two years ago, I never would have bough the idea of Miz actually talking down to the Rock, never mind calling him a coward, but now, it just works so well. The difference is in how the Miz carries himself: he takes himself more seriously, he's no longer just a loud mouthed doofus, his insults are more witty and, well, insulting, and he acts like an actual bad guy rather than an idiot in a fedora. I can safely say that having him stand in the ring with the Rock and Cena feels genuinely /right./ Compare this scene to Wrestlemania 21, when Carlito stood in the ring with Stone Cold and Rowdy Roddy Piper, and looked completely awkward. The illusion is further helped by the fact that the Rock is taking Miz seriously: he's not interrupting, he's not talking down, and he looks utterly outraged (not comically outraged) by the Miz. Surely by now, the Rock seethes, the Miz must know that it doesn't matter what he thinks. I always think it's poignant when a wrestler uses his catchphrase in a menacing fashion, rather then using it to get cheers.

Alex Riley then decks the Rock from behind, and he and the Miz stomp on the Great One while Cena waits outside the ring, watching on. Rock rallies, and tosses Riley over the ropes, then drops the People's Elbow on Miz. He watches the two scurry off, but no sooner does Rock turn around then he is hoisted up by Cena and given the Attitude Adjustment. I love watching the crowd react to seeing this happen: they seem totally beyond belief that such a thing is even possible, and the cheers and boos are just amplified as realization sets in as to what they are seeing. It's not quite on the same level of Rock versus Hogan, but it's up there. Cena glances down at the Rock with satisfaction, as he is the last man standing in the ring out of this rendition of "The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly."

This was a good episode, and a great way to go into Wrestlemania. The promos that were needed to be given were provided, and we still got a couple of decent matches to keep the time. Undertaker/Triple H not only clicked, but rocked, the Trio of Miz, Cena, and Rock was well done, the Punk/Orton storyline has reached it's apex in the rise of action. Still wish we could have had more emotional investment in the US Title match, as I suspect it's going to be the surprise match of Wrestlemania, but it's not a big deal. Raw dragged it's quality average for shows back to .500, and heads to the show of shows with its head held high.